Please God, not yourself or others.

God told me to graduate in 2022.

I decided to take the opportunity to graduate in 2021, pushing myself harder and harder to the point of having several mental breakdowns a day, constantly wanting to die. I wanted to graduate in 2021 because that’s what I was “supposed to do.” Truth is it wasn’t, and I am now suffering from those consequences. Yet even in my suffering God has been faithful to me. I barely have any friends, I’ve angered many people including those who I love because I’ve constantly quit jobs this year. I’ve hurt myself and hurt others. I’m exhausted, but God is still good.

I’ve been able to change lives because I love others. I’ve also tried to people please instead of God please. I’ve done so many things and have inflicted trauma on myself because of it.

I write this to say never follow yourself or others. Follow the God whom saves. He is faithful. He was trying to protect me from everything I’ve endured. Lord be with me. I am so sorry for the sins I’ve committed. For wanting to prove myself to those in whom could never save me, as I cannot save myself either. Only you can save, only you can live and choose who lives. I love you Lord, I pray this year be greater than what I could ever imagine and that the person reading this is blessed by my testimony and that they remember to follow you, even in human error. I love you,

Your daughter. Tiara. ❤️

Struggle

My last semester of college, I struggled.

In fact my entire college experience felt like a struggle. Getting a degree is not easy. I felt overwhelmed constantly. I felt as though because I was getting this degree for God everything had to not just be right but perfect. Boy was I wrong! The truth is God does not expect us to be perfect, He desires us to be righteous through His Son, our Lord and Savior, Yeshua. Our Risen Messiah tells us that He came for those who know they are sinners, not those who believe they are already righteous. As a graduate I look back and I realize how the enemy use perfectionism as a tactic to make me miserable. I felt as if I had to take a certain amount of classes because I wasn’t working my junior and senior year, and that I had to get perfect or near perfect grades to impress others because I wasn’t working or living on campus. Woo! Let me tell you, living for others will get you no where. My degree was supposed to be for Christ yet instead of receiving it righteously by enjoying it, I desired to live for others opinions of me, often ones I made up on my own of what they thought, and my own vision, that I forgot about God’s vision for me. God desires me to be of joy, purity, and peace, and when you are living for others you joy is taken and you worry, your purity is taken because you stop living for God and begin living a perfectionist lifestyle that you can’t obtain, and your peace is gone as depression, anxiety, and fear set in because you cannot live up to these false standards you or other flesh had made up. It is not worth it. I am here to tell you to take it to the cross, hang it up, and follow Jesus! The Bible tells us to hang our iniquities at the cross! We are to crucify our past selves and RISE WITH JESUS CHRIST! Rise with the King of all Kings and live in His ones blessed children of God. Accept Jesus by repenting, believing, accepting, and living in Jesus Christ, He had already done the rest.

Love vs. Sin

“Jesus loves you” is not an excuse to sin. Jesus loves us so much that He died for us to be freed from sin. He doesn’t want us to sin against Him, the Holy Spirit, or His Father in heaven. When Jesus died for us that was the greatest act of love to ever be. That a righteous man, both fully God and man, would take on the responsibility of our sins and resurrect giving us life. Only Jesus could die on the cross for us. We are unworthy, but HIS LOVE gives us worthiness. He declares us righteous and goes before our Father before us, allowing us to be righteous to God our Father. Jesus loves us, yes. But that is not an excuse to sin. It is a call to accept Him as your Lord and Savior, to change our old ways and live a new life in Christ Jesus. Thank you Lord for your love, your peace, your grace, and your mercy in Jesus name. Amen. ❤️

Affirmations

I am loved

I am blessed

I am still standing

I am an overcomer

I am more than who I once was

I love who I once was, though she was broken

I forgive all those who hurt me

I trust the Lord with my life, He has never abandoned me

I am who God says I am:

Loved

Forgiven

Whole

Holy

Righteous

Redeemed

Made for such a time as this

Created in His image

A child of God

A steward of goodness.

You are too ♡